What does silent treatment do to a marriage?

In general, the silent treatment is a manipulation tactic that can leave important issues in a relationship unresolved. It also can leave the partner on the receiving end feeling worthless, unloved, hurt, confused, frustrated, angry, and unimportant.

Is it OK to give your spouse the silent treatment?

Findings from his in-depth analysis revealed that the silent treatment is 'tremendously' damaging to a relationship. It decreases relationship satisfaction for both partners, diminishes feelings of intimacy, and reduces the capacity to communicate in a way that's healthy and meaningful.

What type of person gives the silent treatment?

Avoidance: In some cases, people stay silent in a conversation because they do not know what to say or want to avoid conflict. Communication: A person may use the silent treatment if they do not know how to express their feelings but want their partner to know that they are upset.

What does the silent treatment say about a person?

Research has found that people who received the silent treatment experienced a threat to their needs of belonging, self-esteem, control, and meaningful existence. This type of behavior reinforces the feeling that someone we care about wants nothing to do with us. It can feel as though you don't exist.

What does it mean when your partner gives you the silent treatment?

But some people use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance. If you're on the receiving end of this kind of treatment, you might feel completely ostracized. People who use the silent treatment as a means of control want to put you in your place.

Staying strong during the silent treatment | 3 TIPS to WIN | How to deal with the silent treatment

Is silent treatment toxic?

Why the Silent Treatment Is Toxic. Research has shown time and again that the silent treatment doesn't do your relationship any favors. Specifically, a 2014 study found that couples engaged in a demand-withdraw pattern experience poorer communication, less intimacy, and lower relationship satisfaction.

Is silent treatment disrespectful?

While some people might think that being silent is taking the high road, it can actually be the worst thing you can do. It can leave significant psychological and emotional repercussions on the person on the receiving end.

Is silent treatment Gaslighting?

The silent treatment is strikingly similar to gaslighting, as both flourish in power and control. In fact, some therapists call the silent treatment a form of gaslighting, used to cause personal uncertainty, and a sense of doubt when considering goals, self-views and worldviews.

How do I respond to silent treatment from my husband?

How to Respond to the Silent Treatment from Your Spouse
  1. Don't assume you know the reason for the silent treatment. ...
  2. Explain to your Silent Spouse your need and desire to communicate. ...
  3. Be ready to listen, not just talk. ...
  4. Be gracious, not caustic or sarcastic, when your spouse does make the effort to talk with you.

Why the silent treatment is manipulative?

Essentially, the point of the silent treatment is to make the victim feel confused, stressed, guilty, ashamed, not good enough, or unstable enough so that they would do what the manipulator wants.

Is silent treatment a form of narcissism?

The silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse typically employed by people with narcissistic tendencies.

What is the psychology behind the silent treatment?

Reasons behind silent treatment

Lack of communication skills: Some people feel they lack the skills to express themselves. Punishment: Silent treatment becomes abuse when it is intended to punish, control, or gain power over someone. To make the other person feel bad. To not appear abusive to others.

What are four signs of emotional abuse?

5 Signs of Emotional Abuse
  • They are Hyper-Critical or Judgmental Towards You. ...
  • They Ignore Boundaries or Invade Your Privacy. ...
  • They are Possessive and/or Controlling. ...
  • They are Manipulative. ...
  • They Often Dismiss You and Your Feelings.

How long should the silent treatment last?

The silent treatment can last for hours, days, weeks or months. Some people do this because they are genuinely hurt and unable to speak. When they do feel able to talk, it'll be a two-way conversation. A narcissist uses the silent treatment to punish you.

What is the power of silence in marriage?

Silence speaks louder than verbal speech, penetrating deeper into the hearts of those to whom it is directed. Marriage, as any other institution, is often surrounded by moments of silence between couples, which leads to thoughtful suffering.

How do you break the silent treatment?

Why We Give the Silent Treatment — And What to Do About It
  1. You Can't Reward the Behavior. Many people find that appeasing the withdrawing person, and letting them sulk and stew or coaxing them out of it, as tantamount to giving into a screaming toddler. ...
  2. Give Yourself Some Alone Time. ...
  3. Talk — At the Right Time. ...
  4. Don't Engage.

What does the silent treatment mean from a man?

The silent treatment (also known as withholding) is used to punish and regain control of a person. It may feel good to ignore your partner when you feel slighted but, it keeps you from finding real solutions to the problems that are bugging you the most.

Is it abuse to give someone the silent treatment?

Silent treatment abuse is a form of emotional abuse in which a person refuses to communicate with you in order to control or influence your behaviors. Taking time to cool down after an argument is healthy, but shutting off communication for a long time, especially in order to control another person, is a form of abuse.

Why does my husband ignore me when I'm upset?

Your husband can't handle emotions

Your husband might have no idea how to handle emotions. He may not have learnt how to from his parents or carers. He may feel upset that you're upset! He may have learnt it's no use expressing your feelings as a child – nothing changes.

Why is the silent treatment so hurtful?

The silent treatment is a particularly insidious form of abuse because it might force the victim to reconcile with the perpetrator in an effort to end the behavior, even if the victim doesn't know why they're apologizing. “It's especially controlling because it deprives both sides from weighing in,” Williams said.

What are examples of gaslighting in a marriage?

Gaslighting spouses turn the tables and blame you for their poor behavior. They distort the narrative to make you appear to be the one mistreating them. For example, if you work overtime, you neglect them and do not want to spend time with them. Therefore, you must be having an affair.

Is it immature to give silent treatment?

Silent treatment can be an immature way of dealing with situations and its practice should not be made a habit of. Imagine you have upset your loved one for some reason and they are angry with you.

How do you respond to being ignored?

How Do You Respond To Being Ignored?
  1. Take a step back. Your partner may simply need some space to collect their thoughts and deal with their own emotions. ...
  2. Distract yourself. ...
  3. Check if they are actually ignoring you. ...
  4. Try not to overreact. ...
  5. Communicate.

Is the silent treatment worse than yelling?

Many abuse survivors say they hated the silent treatment more than the insults or yelling. When they were shouted at, at least they knew what was on the abuser's mind, and could better assess their own and their children's safety. Stone-cold silence can reinforce feelings of vulnerability and fear.

What are signs of narcissistic abuse?

Signs of Narcissistic Abuse
  • Signs of narcissistic abuse include:
  • Love-bombing. It's not unusual for people with NPD to shower you with compliments and affection. ...
  • Gaslighting. ...
  • Ignoring boundaries. ...
  • Projecting. ...
  • Nitpicking. ...
  • Some common examples of narcissistic abuse include: ...
  • Anxiety and depression.